TLA
Posts : 85
Points : 3813
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Join date : 2014-07-18
Location : Miami, FL
 |  Subject: Dawg Gonna Bite You  Thu Aug 14, 2014 12:01 am | |
| (TLA is shown restraining Steroid Dawg from a white fan who made the mistake of trying to feed her.)
TLA: Yo sorry for maga dog, him turn around and bite you.
(The fan runs away screaming as Steroid Dawg opens her mouth to hand the man's wallet to TLA.)
TLA: Good dawg. This mah dawg that. Mah dawg a good dawg when yo boi need shit done. When yo boi need that paper. This Houston right here, we got a lesbian mayor up in here. Yea that's how Houston rolls. Bitches on top of bitches on top of bitches. They say Houston we have a problem, Houston be all like I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. We watchin' them bitches fuck each other ain't no problem here.
(A police officer approaches TLA.)
TLA: I know what you done need. Let TLA do for you. Cuz not doin' is somethin' a nigga not doin'.
(TLA gives the police officer a discount on that ganja.)
TLA: The holy herb be unitin' the world. Soon the whole world gonna be chiefin' as one. We will all be a hybrid society hyped up on that smoke. Only then will true peace be obtained. Wars gonna end cuz Muslims and Jews gonna be too high as fuck to bomb each other. Democrats and Republicans gonna be swappin' bitches left and right like yo we ain't even mad brah. We gotta be all friendly 'n' shit except to haters. Cuz I got love for y'all haters but fuck you imma reaper and you gonna die you step in the way of TLA's hybrid society of peaceful intoxication.
(TLA chiefs on that blunt into a state of peace as King Mustafa appears before him in a vision.)
King Mustafa: TLA what the fuck are you doing getting high when you got a championship to bring home to my Palace? The lions are most displeased!
TLA: Yo fuck off with that Lion King bullshit mayne. It's lame as fuck and we don't want none of that shit. Remember that time when I made all of them lame ass dawg references that was gay as fuck. Shit was like sellin' out to the man but Allah knows I ain't never gonna do that.
(Steroid Dawg growls loudly at TLA.)
TLA: But for real I got love for mah dawg. Mah dawg that be mah dawg there. Mah dawg everywhere bitin' you. Steroid Dawg 305 says I just bit yo ass.
(Steroid Dawg seems content.)
King Mustafa: You have some serious competition this week. Need King Mustafa remind you, Vic Vendetta disgraced us last week. How shall you get into Paradise if you do not bring gold to the house of my fathers?
TLA: I'll get all up into that Paradise when I bring this dick to the pussy of yo sisters.
King Mustafa: You dare to defy the Great Mustafa?
TLA: I sure do. Also Nick Angel can go fuck himself. This shit is gettin' ridiculous. He be firin' eses left and right. He ain't gonna fire TLA tho. I'm a valuable fucking asset to this company and it is time that I make all of the suits recognize just how sexy I am.
King Mustafa: You saw what happened to Matt Miles and Casey Jones last week right? That could be you next! We must plan our next move carefully...
TLA: I'm always plannin' and schemin'. Feastin' and beastin'. I'd like to see Nick Angel fire me. I been fired before and TLA always comes through in the end. And the people who fuck with TLA always get fucked with and destroyed. I am a dangerous man and my enemies don't even realize this until it is too late. Sometimes not even then. Cuz I got that ninja stealth, they be underestimatin' me. I play them so bad straight into ignorance that they don't even realize that it was the Sexual Panther himself who caused they downfall. They go to they graves still not knowin' cuz they don't deserve to know, and mah ego ain't so big I need that credit. I go real hardcore covert secret agent takedown on they ass. That's how Nick Angel will go down. He will be fed to Steroid Dawg in a platter of blood as TLA laughs down on him while fuckin' his bitch through the bunk bed.
King Mustafa: Good good.
TLA: Nick Angel don't want TLA to win this match. But I gotta capture this gold. I don't give no fucks who wins that other Hybrid Championship but I'm pullin' for mah boi C5 Ion. He whipped that Alioth Starre ass last week and be on that undefeated streak swag goin' for the gold. And it would be an honor to team with a man like him who actually be givin' some fucks 'bout this company and its great fans.
King Mustafa: Yes C5 Ion would do well running alongside my Pride. He is a true force to be reckoned with much like the holy prophet himself.
TLA: Truuu. Nigga he a real one. But don't think I forgot 'bout Nick Angel's hired goons. Trent Richards and Vic Vendetta. Who the fuck y'all think you is? You think you can fuck with TLA and there ain't gonna be no payback? Jay Striker and Terry Chambers I ain't got no time for y'all to get in mah way. Beat each others asses all you want cuz I'm gunnin' for the other haters and they gonna go down right quick to the Miami Quickness ya heard?
(Steroid Dawg howls loudly disturbing many people walking past.)
King Mustafa: The war has been declared, now we wait for our enemies destruction, and we will revel in the trophies we take from them. King Mustafa will reign supreme as the great horde takes over the entire universe! And for TLA, Allah's great Warrior, and black cat among the Pride. You shall redeem yourself yet for when you capture the XMW Hybrid Championship, the trophy which is only half of a grander whole, you shall do so not only for yourself, but for the people. Indeed indeed indeed. All shall be most pleased.
(King Mustafa smiles greedily as he begins to discuss strategy for the upcoming 6 Man Rage in a Cage Match on Affliction.) | |
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